I had a day off today.
I was sitting in my closet-sized bedroom scrolling through twitter.
My girlfriend was at work.
Decided I was going to walk to the restaurant I work at to pick-up a tip-out.
I put on sweatpants and walked outside.
The first thing I noticed was all the trash everywhere.
I walked down the road and saw a shoe on a roof, and that was nice, too.
Saw some more trash.
Saw a punching bag punch in the shape of a person. The person-shaped punching bag was wearing a gorilla mask. It was in the driveway of a cinderblock house with at least a dozen NO TRESPASSING signs.
I saw a house with too many American flags to feel okay thinking about.
The fenced-off retention pond across from the Family Dollar seemed to be a little low.
I crossed the street.
Saw a car coming towards me.
Felt like the car sped up to hit me, but I did a little jog.
And for some reason I thought, “Yee-haw.”